Been missing for a long time on DA basically because I decided I needed to change up my house situation. From pretty much the point when I got into art in middle school, to up to about a month ago, I've always made my creations in whatever bedroom I had at the time. I decided this absolutely had to change. So, for the past month, I've been redesigning my basement to transform it into something amazing and functional. And by basement, I mean a total nightmare, haha. I live in a house that is about 200 years old with a couple of my relatives, so we're talking asbestos, wooden beams, cloth-covered-wires, holes in the stone walls, everything awful you could think of pretty much. The fact that I live with my relatives, is alone, awful enough, so I decided I needed a workshop space to go nuts and create anything that comes to mind, also to separate leisure, and "work", I've found there's a very fine line between the two for me.
Having said that, for the past two years, I've been basically in melt down mode, but I never realized it fully. I could tell something was majorly off, but never knew quite what. I would always tend to freak out about things, but freaking out for me isn't like it is for most people, I kind of just fog over and shut down. At times this would last a couple of hours, to a day or so, all the way up to weeks on end, and the past two years really just flew by for me because I hadn't done anything or made my time worth while, and it all just snowballed. I, for the most part just lost myself, and forgot how to live at all. I've been without any source of consistent income during this time as well, which has been hugely stressful on top of everything else. I had been trying to wrap my head around finding a job just to make a few extra dollars, but I had adopted the saying "If you don't work to build your dreams, somebody else will hire you to build theirs" and that thought has been haunting me ever since, because it is 10,000% true.
Flash forward to 2015, and New Years hit, then I sort of had an awakening of sorts, I can't really explain it, but the prospect of a brand new year just took hold of me. I've been trying to do a lot more to better myself, like looking after myself physically, mentally, and diet wise. I've been eating fresh vegetables and fruits non-stop putting my dusty kitchen cutlery to good use, started reading books again, getting into inspiring things like TED Talks, and just plain running around the house a lot more than I used to(the snow kills the ability to go outside). I've also been trying to "think globally, change locally", or however the saying goes. In other words, trying to see the bigger picture, not just obsessing over small, singular problems. So now I'm getting my workshop going, which I've dubbed "THE DUNGEON"
, simply because it has a lovely sort of serial killer-esque vibe to it, but, it's looking promising since I installed way too many lights to counter the Jack-the-ripper aura, and organized my odd assortment of shop tools, art tools, and plethora of materials. Looking to the future, I'm going to try my hand at making a Kickstarter with my steampunk designs, get into some furniture making, and most definitely funding better sculpting materials (sculpey is cool and all, but it's rather expensive at $15 a pound, and isn't as durable as they make it sound). So to sum it up, I've got my fingers crossed for some strong winds to push me in the right direction, and to fully help me understand who the hell I am, and to help people see the true me as well.